Not all women feel comfortable with a male boudoir photographer. I totally understand it. I don’t know that I would feel completely comfortable in front of a female photographer while being mostly nude. Let’s face it, we never feel completely comfortable with the opposite sex looking. However, there are several reasons you should choose a man, specifically me, to be your boudoir photographer.

Men’s Magazines Use Male Photographers

GQ to Maxim, Sports Illustrated to Esquire all have male photographers shooting for their magazines. Photography has been a male dominated industry and only recently have women started to enter the field with the advent of digital making it easier to be the family photographer. With as much money as those companies spend on producing their magazines, they know what they are doing when it comes to photographing women.

Sexy is for Guys

Let’s get real. The reason the lingerie industry exists is so women can look sexy for a guy. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for a woman buying lingerie for herself and wearing it to feel sexy. But if a woman gets the chance, she’d be happy in sweats and a tee at home watching Netflix. Guys are the same way too. Men would spend a lot less money on cars, suits, houses, and education if it didn’t impress women.

Dead poet society quote about wooing women with Robin Williams.
“Language was invented for one reason, boys- to woo women.”

Men spend the money they do to be the kind of guy that impresses a girl and girls spend the time putting on makeup to look sexy. The perpetual chase of cat and mouse.

Attraction

 Black & White photograph of a woman lying on a bed captured by a male boudoir photographer.
Copyright © Red Silk Photos

There is something to be said about being in front of someone of the opposite sex. You don’t need to be an exhibitionist to want to do a boudoir session. Being in front of someone of the opposite sex makes it easier to flirt or get “into character.” If you feel comfortable throwing sexy bedroom eyes to a woman, then hire a woman. Most females, however, find that it is easier to turn on the sex appeal when it is someone they could possibly be attracted to or might be attracted to them. No, I don’t want to have sex with the women I shoot. I have a lovely wife at home. As a guy, however, women naturally look at me differently than they do another woman. Great photography doesn’t just happen when the shutter is clicked. It happens in the emotions of the model and the artist. Creating the right emotional environment leads to better shot aesthetics.

Aesthetics

Men and women have clearly different aesthetic tastes. Female boudoir photographers usually capture the soft and reserved side of a woman. A male will typically have more raw sexuality. The sexuality comes across as passion, desire, and drive in the images. A good photograph doesn’t just capture a sexy pose, but also the emotions behind it.

I also know when something is “too” sexy. I don’t want to capture images that make my clients look like something out of the adult entertainment industry. If a pose or look is too provocative, I can change it or the camera position to capture a better look. As a guy, it is easier for me to push the line of sensual imagery because I can pull back where a female photographer may not take the risk at all.

Compliments

When a woman compliments another woman, all kinds of thoughts go through her head. This is due to thousands of years of biology. Joyce Beneson wrote a fascinating book about how men and women socialize differently. She contends that women are not overtly aggressive, but instead engage in subtle sabotaging techniques. Yes, men are typically the more “violent” of the species, but you can always know exactly where you stand with a guy. Is it so with a woman?

Posing

Like the attraction section above, I know what looks good. One of my favorite things to do is show a girl exactly how to pose by taking the pose myself. This always gets a good laugh from my client and breaks the ice. I spend hours studying posing. Everybody type has poses that flatter it and those that don’t. Knowing which to use is one of the things that will guarantee a better session.

Black and white boudoir photograph of a woman wearing a black bra and looking away from the camera.

No Judgement

Isn’t it great to not be judged. To just have your picture taken without feeling like the person on the other side of the camera is threatened by your sexuality. A guy can give that feeling when another woman can’t. You can see it in his eyes that he isn’t judging you. Any compliment from a woman can seem like a subtle attack on your physic.

With a Pro, Gender is Irrelevant

When it comes down to brass tacks, pros produce quality images. Their professionalism make gender irrelevant. Seeing a male or female OBGYN doesn’t change how much they know as a professional. Some women feel more comfortable with a female and some don’t care either way. While I am not a doctor, I do have a code of ethics I live by which includes protecting my clients’ privacy. Not every image I show on my website is a model, but I always get client permission. And some women say no. That is okay. Ultimately, every woman should get a boudoir session done, not every woman should go with a guy to do it.

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